Why God Made Moms.

Sorry, this is not really fern related, but I had to share it.

The best segue I can come up with is that my Mom made me water
the ferns when I was growing up. 
My best guess is that they were Tasmanian Treeferns, six feet
tall, at least.
The ferns, that is. Mom was 5'-2" at her tallest and is shrinking daily.

Hug your Mom for me.
If she's not still around, remember the last time you hugged her.
-BN

If you don't like this email, tell Ross (list-Dad), he'll kick me off the list...


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> Answers given by 2nd grade schoolchildren to the following questions:
>
> Why did God make mothers?
>  1. She's the only one who knows where the Scotch Tape is.
>  2. Mostly to clean the house.
>  3. To push us out of there when we were getting born.   
>
> How did God make mothers?
>  1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
>  2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
>  3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
>
> What ingredients are mothers made of?
>  1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice 
>     in the world and one dab of mean.
>  2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use 
>     string, I think.   
>
> Why did God give you your mother and not some other Mom?
>  1. We're related.
>  2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's Moms like me.
>
> What kind of little girl was your Mom?
>  1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other stuff.
>  2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
>  3. They say she used to be nice.
>
> What did Mom need to know about Dad before she married him?   
>  1. His last name.
>  2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? 
>  3. Does he make at least $800 a year? 
>  4. Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?   
>
> Why did your Mom marry your Dad?
>  1. My Dad makes the best spaghetti in the world, and my Mom eats a lot.
>  2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
>  3. My Grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
>
> Who's the boss at your house?
>  1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because Dad's such a goofball.
>  2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
>  3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than Dad.
>
> What's the difference between moms and dads?   
>  1. Moms work at work and work at home, & Dads just work at work.
>  2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
>  3. Dads are taller & stronger, but Moms have all the real power 'cause 
>     that's who you've got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. 
>  4. Moms have magic; they make you feel better without medicine.   
>
> What does your Mom do in her spare time?
>  1. Moms don't have any spare time.
>  2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.   
>
> What would it take to make your Mom perfect?
>  1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
>
> If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?
>  1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
>  2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
>  3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.   



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