RE: tolerance of lack of same

What she said.




From: "Lynda Young" <lyoung@grindertaber.com>
Reply-To: gardenchat@hort.net
To: <gardenchat@hort.net>
Subject: RE: [CHAT]tolerance of lack of same
Date: Tue, 25 Nov 2003 07:49:18 -0600

Pam, I've always had touble with the theory that one needs a mate to be
'complete'.  What rubbish - and what an incredible burden to place on
someone else.  As for orientation - not a criteria for judging the value
of a person in my opinion.  So, you just go about your life and laugh at
anyone who questions the choices you have made, knowing that there are
loads of people out here who hold you in the highest esteem and think
you're darn near perfect.

Lynda
Zone 7 - West TN

-----Original Message-----
From: owner-gardenchat@hort.net [o*@hort.net] On
Behalf Of Kitty
Sent: Monday, November 24, 2003 9:12 PM
To: gardenchat@hort.net
Subject: Re: [CHAT]tolerance of lack of same


> scorned, ignored, ridiculed, vilified and ostracized for my choice for

> a long time. Jesse's best friend from KC questioned my "orientation"

Pam,
A woman I worked with made that suggestion to me because I questioned
why she wouldn't change her own tire.  I think people who are caught off
guard like to use that as a tactic to push someone's buttons.  This
woman had a flat tire, left the car somewhere and got a lift to work and
called her husband (an airline pilot) to leave work and come fix her
tire.  You could tell by the phone conversation that it would not be
easy for him to leave work - but on this end you could tell she planned
to make his life hell if he didn't.  I asked her why she didn't do it
herself.  She sputtered, "What do you think I got married for?!"  And
then she laid into me about my 'sexual orientation' because I can change
a tire.  I thought this was funny because she knew I'd been married
twice, and besides, I wouldn't consider it an insult - but I also
wouldn't consider it to have any bearing on fixing a flat.

> ... I know it's not a usual lifestyle in a world of couples

Living alone is not unusual.  Lots of people do.  As long as it works
for you and you have the network of friends you want and need (including
Sugar), there is no need to feel odd-man-out.  I've been alone since '89
and frankly these 14 years have been much better for me than the
previous 14.  I don't understand why anyone would give you a hard time
for being single and orientation is nobody's business.

Kitty

----- Original Message -----
From: "Pamela J. Evans" <gardenqueen@gbronline.com>
To: <gardenchat@hort.net>
Sent: Monday, November 24, 2003 7:45 PM
Subject: Re: [CHAT]tolerance of lack of same


> I'm sorry if I sound defensive - that is not my intent. I have been
> scorned, ignored, ridiculed, vilified and ostracized for my choice for

> a long time. Jesse's best friend from KC questioned my "orientation"
> as others have done, though she was nice (and funny) about it - some
> weren't. I know it's not a usual lifestyle in a world of couples, but
> it does work for moi. And no, Sugar is WAY to possessive to allow
> another animal on the property, let alone in the house. She's an only
> child and LIKES it that way.
>
>
> ---------- Original Message ----------------------------------
> From: "Jesse Bell" <jesserenebell@hotmail.com>
> Reply-To: gardenchat@hort.net
> Date:  Mon, 24 Nov 2003 12:58:05 -0600
>
> >See?  I've said the same thing...she needs a few more cats.  But
> >Sugar
will
> >NOT allow that...no way.
> >
> >Jesse Rene' Bell
> >Claremore, OK
> >Zone 6
> >
> >
> >
> >>From: Aplfgcnys@aol.com
> >>Reply-To: gardenchat@hort.net
> >>To: gardenchat@hort.net
> >>Subject: Re: [CHAT]tolerance of lack of same
> >>Date: Mon, 24 Nov 2003 13:46:11 EST
> >>
> >>In a message dated 11/24/2003 11:17:41 AM Eastern Standard Time,
> >>gardenqueen@gbronline.com writes:
> >>
> >> > I don't have much patience w/ boneheads (of either gender) -
> >> > that's
why
> >> > I live w/ a cat!! She's perfect! People used to tell me there's a

> >> > lid for every pot. I didn't believe that when I was 15 and I
> >> > don't
believe
> >> > it 31 years later. Especially after the parade of losers,
> >> > knotheads
and
> >> > whackos I've been exposed to. Glad your luck was better than
> >> > mine!!
> >> >
> >> >
> >>
> >>Pam, don't feel so defensive about living alone.  Just be thankful
> >>you
are
> >>strong and competent enough to have a satisfactory life on your own
> >>-
and
> >>that
> >>you didn't stumble into a dysfunctional relationship by mistake.
> >>You
and
> >>Sugar
> >>make a fine family - but I just wish you had more cats. Auralie
> >>
> >>--------------------------------------------------------------------
> >>-
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> >>message text UNSUBSCRIBE GARDENCHAT
> >>
> >
> >_________________________________________________________________
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> >by service area.)
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> >
>
> --
> Pam Evans
> Kemp TX/zone 8A
>
>
>
> --
>
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