More SNOW,VOLES,Red Peppers and Hostas
- Subject: More SNOW,VOLES,Red Peppers and Hostas
- From: firstname.lastname@example.org (Glen Williams)
- Date: Fri, 4 Apr 2003 12:51:31 -0500
As I write this I am crying. Somehow in a combination of sneeze, cough ,
and the act of breathing, I have managed to get a piece of very hot red
pepper flake up my nose. It has burned incredibly and so I have sprayed
some Afrin as a chaser. This combination has created a new
taste/smell/poison gas which is quite memorable. But through this pain, and
the fact that I don't want to deal with the 10 inches of snow we got this
morning , I am led to share some stuff about voles that was just on the
radio on NPR. When I heard voles mentioned I immediately thought of hostas.
Through my tears I can see legions of voles munching of thousands of very
expensive hostas...any sane hosta person would.
The mention of voles did not lead to a discussion of hostas, as I had
hoped. The voles were being used in an experiment (gene identification)
because they are such a profound family animal species. They pair-bond for
life (no quickie divorces in this species), and seem to have an incredible
social structure : team bowling, intergenerational group picnics( you
know on what!), and extended garden club trips to Aruba. The genetic
factors which lead to this bonding, are theorized to be missing from
autistic individuals, as autism appears to be directly related to a lack of
social needs or capacity to interact with others. This all comes under
the category of "who would have thunk it?", but I'll bet it changes my
attitude towards dealing with voles.
I will make the sacrifice and order more hostas this year for these little
gregarious souls. I ask you, could I have been looking for a reason to buy
hostas in the middle of one more snowstorm?
I wonder if hostas are doing a genetic study of us which will enhance their
capacity to exist in their vast numbers when the next asteroid strikes,
and half of mankind is wiped out. EVOLUTION CERTAINLY MAY WORK IN
MYSTERIOUS WAYS. ARE HOSTAS GOING TO RULE THE EARTH? Hmmmm. Maybe its time
to go and use the snowblower. There are only so many meanders like this
that can be seen as an example of mental health. It must be the red pepper
flakes up my nose.
20 Dewey St.
Springfield , Vermont
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