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Re: For all my beer-drinking friends (and other beverages)

 There's hope!
 The following is an actual excerpt from this month's Forbe's Magazine:
 A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when
 the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that
 are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole,
 because the general speed and health of the whole is maintained or even
 improved by the regular culling of the weakest members.
 In much the same way, the human brain can operate only as fast as the
 slowest brain cells through which the electrical signals pass. Recent
 epidemiological studies have shown that while excessive intake of alcohol
 kills off brain cells, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells
 Thus, regular consumption of beer helps eliminate the weaker cells,
 constantly making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
 The result of this in-depth study verifies and validates the causal link
 between all-weekend parties and job related performance. It also
 explains why, after a few short years of leaving a university and getting
 married most professionals cannot keep up with the performance of the new
 Only those few that stick to the strict regimen of voracious alcoholic
 consumption can maintain the intellectual levels that they achieve during
 their college years.
 So, this is a call to arms. As our country is losing its technological
 edge, we must not shudder in our homes. Get back into the bars. Neck
 that pint. Your company and country need you to be at your peak, and you
 shouldn't deny yourself the career that you could have.
 Take life by the bottle and be all that you can be.
 Lager, drink the best.

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