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Just For Grins

  • Subject: Just For Grins
  • From: Jim Sherwood <jimwsherwood@yahoo.com>
  • Date: Wed, 3 Oct 2001 23:25:02 -0700 (PDT)

  Jim Sherwood <jimwsherwood@yahoo.com> wrote:


Just For Grins

Reader J. K. Bounds forwarded this item, which appears to have made quite
a few rounds through the email before I got it:
     THERE OUGHTA BE A LAW
     O'Reilly's law of the kitchen: Cleanliness is next to impossible.
     Lieberman's law: Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody
       listens.
     Denniston's law: Virtue is its own punishment.
     Gold's law: If the shoe fits, its ugly.
     Conway's law: In any organization, there will always be one person
       who knows what is going on. This person should be fired.
     Finster's law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.
     Lynch's law: When the going gets tough, everyone leaves.
     Muir's law: When we try to separate anything out by itself, we find
       it hitched to everything else in the universe.
     Glyme's formula for success: The secret of success is sincerity.
       Once you can fake that, you've got it made.
     Mason's first law of synergism: The one day you'd sell your
       birthright for something, birthrights are a glut.
     Hanlon's razor: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately
       explained by stupidity.
     Handy guide to modern science: If it's green or wriggles, it's
       biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work,
       it's physics.
     Green' s law of debate: Anything is possible if you don't know what
       you're talking about.
     Stewart's law of retroaction: It is easier to get forgiveness than
       permission.
     First rule of history: History doesn't repeat itself, historians
       merely repeat each other.
     Oliver's law of location: No matter where you go, there you are.
     Harrison's postulate: For every action, there is an equal and
       opposite criticism.
                           

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