Fw: [Fwd: Fwd: Stuff :-)]


From: "Vernon Brown" <vgbro@peoplepc.com>

> > > 1.   If  at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
> > > 2.   Psychiatrists say that 1 out of 4 people are mentally ill.
> > >      Check three friends.  If they're OK, you're it.
> > > 3.  It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in
rats.
> > > 4.  Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.
> > > 5.  It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a
> > >      warning to others.
> > > 6.   Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
> > > 7   Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
> > > 8.   I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
> > > 9.   Honk if you love peace and quiet.
> > > 10. Don't sweat petty things....or pet sweaty things.
> > > 11. Boycott shampoo!  Demand the REAL poo !
> > > 12. If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
> > > 13. What happens if you get scared  half to death twice?
> > > 14. I used to have an open mind, but my brains kept falling out.
> > > 15. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
> > > 16. For  Sale:  Parachute.  Used only once, never opened, small stain.
> > > 17. Why do they sterilize needles for a lethal injection?
> > > 18. If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day 365 days a year,
> > >       why are there locks on the doors?
> > > 19.Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmuts?
> > > 20.Why can't they make airplanes out of the same material as that
little
> > >      black box data recorder?
> > > 21. Why do light switches say on/off? When it's on, you can see it's
on,
> > >      and when it's off you can't see to read.
> > > 22. Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM ?
> > >
>
> --
>
>
>


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