Re: Fw: AIS eligibility or not
iris@hort.net
  • Subject: Re: Fw: AIS eligibility or not
  • From: &* t* <t*@cs.com>
  • Date: Wed, 16 Dec 2009 23:20:55 +0100
Oh, Griff!
you made my day!
(even if it's close to midnight here and i'm going to bed!

Thank you so much!

ZE FRENCHMAN

  ----- Original Message -----
  From: J. Griffin Crump
  To: iris@hort.net
  Sent: Wednesday, December 16, 2009 10:31 PM
  Subject: [iris] Fw: AIS eligibility or not


  Oops  --  This should have gone to iris@hort , so here it is.


  ----- Original Message -----
  From: J. Griffin Crump
  To: iris-photos@yahoogroups.com
  Sent: Wednesday, December 16, 2009 4:28 PM
  Subject: OT: AIS eligibility or not


  OT, since his arrival on the planet sometime in the 1990s, has become
  something of an international bum, spending a couple of years here, a
couple
  there, and, occasionally, dropping in when he's in the vicinity.  Being
from
  another planet, he has always been intrigued by how members of our species
  (the human one) interact, especially those of various ethnicities.  Now,
  visiting here for the holidays, he was looking over my shoulder as I
perused
  the messages regarding which irises are eligible for the Dykes Medal given
by
  AIS.

  "Ha!", he said, reading Loic's first posting, "Here's a Frenchman living in
  Holland giving the Americans what-for for discriminating against the
British
  when awarding an iris named for an Englishman!  --  A paradox, a paradox, a
  most ingenious paradox . . ."  He began hopping around, humming the Gilbert
  and Sullivan tune.

  "Now, wait a minute", I said, "here's a message from a Scot (at least by
her
  name) in the American Southwest, saying that there are different Dykes
Medals
  awarded to irises first introduced in different countries. And, apparently,
  that's okay with the Brits."

  "Okay," said OT, "but here's the Frenchman quoting the American Iris
Society's
  Handbook and still objecting that it restricts the award to irises first
  introduced in the United States or Canada."

  "Speaking of which," I replied, "here's a message from a Canadian who says
  that the AIS Dykes Medal is an award from the British Iris Society on
licence
  to AIS, and that there are other Dykes Medal licences to other
nationalities.

  "Well," said OT, "the Irish would agree that the British are licentious.
But
  look, here's a message from a Hungarian in northern Virginia.  He says we
  should pay attention to the name of the organization, and that "American
[as
  in AIS] is one of those tricky words. In a very broad sense, it would apply
to
  both north and South American continents, a more restricted sense applies
it
  to North America only, and, in the strictest sense, it applies only to the
  US."

  "The Hungarians are very good at making fine distinctions," I answered.
"They
  can also be very expansive, especially when it comes to boundaries.  But in
  this case, I think he's leaving it open."

  "Look at this one," said OT.  "I think it's from some kind of Viking,
although
  he lives in North Carolina.  It's a long message."

  "Like the ships," I said.

  "He says," continued OT, ignoring my witticism, "that there is 'a
discrepancy
  within the American awards system since all of the American Medals are open
to
  anyone in the world provided they introduce it first in North America (USA
and
  Canada).'   "He says that the "first" is ambiguous, since it could mean, on
  the one hand, only that the iris had to have been introduced in the U.S. or
  Canada, so that judges of these countries would have a chance to evaluate
it,
  or, on the other hand, it could mean that it had to be introduced in the
U.S.
  or Canada before it was introduced anywhere else.  He favors the first
  interpretation, but says that the AIS Board adopted the second.  He says
the
  matter came up before the Board again this fall, but doesn't say what
  happened."

  At this point, I decided to call it a night.  I retired, and OT, pursuing
his
  study of aberrations in the human psyche, stayed up to watch Dave
Letterman.

  On the following day, we found that the discussion had taken a different
  tack.

  OT observed that "The Frenchman says he forgot that there were other Dykes
  Medals besides the North American one, complimented the Americans on having
  been able to work together to accomplish this award and expressed his hope
  that the Europeans would do likewise."

  "Let's nominate Loic for President of the Council of Europe", sez I.

  "Agreed," OT responds, "except that, as non-Europeans, we might find it
  difficult to get their ear."

  "Here's another message," I report.  "From her first name, I'd say she's
  Irish.  She says that at the last Board meeting, someone suggested that the
  Dykes could only be awarded to an iris of North American origin, and they
  discussed what constituted American origin, like, for instance, a seed pod
set
  in Australia and grown in the US versus a seed pod set in North America and
  grown in Australia . . .

  "Oh, rats!" exclaimed OT, surprisingly, since he doesn't usually get upset
  about things.

  "Rats!", he said again.

  "What's up?", I asked.

  "Look here," he said.  "It's a message from the Welshman in California."

  "You mean, Numero Uno?  Our listmeister?"

  "Yes, and he says they not only discussed it, but they adopted it, and that
he
  made the motion!  He quotes it.  Here's what it says: "The American Dykes
  Medal . . . is restricted to irises first originated and introduced in the
  United States or Canada.  Irises originated elsewhere, although not
eligible
  for the American Dykes Medal, are eligible for other AIS awards . . " etc.

  "Well", I said, "that settles it.  So?"

  "So," said OT, actually appearing agitated, "you remember the seedling that
  bloomed for me in Hawaii?"

  "Oh, sure," I replied, "the one you said you're going to introduce as
'POTUS'
  in honor of ---

  "That's the one."

  "Well, what about it?

  "Well," he said, dejectedly, "it first bloomed in Hawaii, all right, but
the
  cross wasn't made there.  It was made in  ---

  "Wait! Stop!" I said.  "Don't tell me!"

  "And the seed . . " he continued.

  "I don't want to hear it!" I cried.

  I turned back to the computer.  "Here's a message from Holland . . ."

  "I saw it," said OT.  "The Frenchman burned his judges handbook."  He
  shrugged.  "I was just thinking . . . about that seedling . . . actually,
only
  you and I know . . ."

  "OT," I said, "You're beginning to think like an earthling."


  --  Griff

  Griffin's Den
  www.pilmore.com/griffinsden
  Zone 7 along the tidal Potomac near Mount Vernon, in Virginia

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