when will the female blossom form


I am growing my first Jack O' Lantern (cucurbita pepo)pumpkins for Halloween.
I planted seeds in a whiskey barrel. The vines are about 2-4' long. There 
are tons of "male" flowers only.
Do the female flowers generally take longer?  Some of the male flowers have 
dropped. Did they die
of old age? ha ha
Anyway, with all I have been reading about pollinating I wonder about the 
female blossom.

I understand it is a good idea to select only a few nice pumpkins and pick 
the rest. At what point
should I consider doing this. Blossom stage or developed pumpkin stage? The 
seed packet suggests
pulling all blossoms after the first 2 pumpkins have formed.  I would 
imagine if I have planted several plants
in the barrel, I can keep perhaps 2 pumpkins per plant. What do you all 
recommend?
Thanks, Paula

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