RE: Annual Pumpkin Regatta

Cap'n Chris
NZHMS Ponz with Intercucurbit Ballistic Sweetcorn  with seed seeking
capability and contour hugging vine cutters  - reporting for duty SAH.

> -----Original Message-----
> From:	Pumkinguy [SMTP:Pumkinguy@aol.com]
> Sent:	Friday, 2 January 1998 15:18
> To:	pumpkins@mallorn.com
> Subject:	Re: Annual Pumpkin Regatta
> 
> Mark,
>    You pose an interesting question on how to properly arm a combat
> type
> pumpkin vessel. I would think a full term Zucchini tipped with an M-80
> could
> deal a lethal strike. Maybe we need to form a Skunkworks department to
> conduct
> top secret research on maximizing the offensive and defensive
> capabilities of
> the Atlantic Giant Cucurboat. What would happen if Gus Saunders' band
> of Merry
> Men decided to swoop down Lake Ontario with a pumpkin armada armed to
> the
> teeth. They could take poor Joe C. and the Oswego boys without ever
> firing a
> zucchini torpedo. It would be a sad day  in the annals of American
> Naval
> Warfare. Topsfield ,on the other hand, would be a much tougher foe.
> The Swamp
> Yankees are trained in guerilla warfare, hiding behind their tractors
> and
> rototillers, and would be much more difficult to take out. May I
> suggest that
> the East and West coast growers should get together at the earliest
> possible
> time and form a battle plan. I suggest the initial talks should
> involve the
> East and West because the East has the only seasoned pumpkin pilots in
> the
> world and the West has long been known for their military think tanks.
> The
> growers in the midwest will be incorporated as soon as we come up with
> our
> battle plan for the Midwesterners have demonstrated the ability to
> grow a
> stout pumpkin that we may be able to use for destroyers. If Gus and Al
> Eaton
> teamed up , they could travel West and be in Lake Michigan and Gary
> Keyzers
> back yard before you know it. What I am saying is, there are few
> places safe
> in the U.S. from a Canadian attack. It is time to take action ....BE
> PREPARED!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now so far, Gus Saunders has been a fairly peace
> loving
> individual. What happens if he snaps and turns bad. He could assemble
> a war
> fleet in 130 days!! A scarey thought. Maybe I am an alarmist, but in
> order to
> insure that future generations of young americans can peacefully
> navigate
> their cucurboats, it is imperative to walk softly and carry a big
> zucchini. I
> better end this before the men in the white coats come for me.
>                                                    pumkinguy@aol.com  
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