The Great World Witches' Broom Race
- To: "pumpkins@lorien.mallorn.com"
- Subject: The Great World Witches' Broom Race
- From: T* S*
- Date: Mon, 02 Nov 1998 10:56:05 -0800
I hope you all enjoyed your Halloween as much as I did. It was a lovely,
crisp, evening, with that magical, slightly smoky scent to the air. I
was late leaving for the race, because I had made sure I got the gardens
of every pumpkin list member in North America. I also added an extra,
color-enhancement spell, to make all your more colorful. Hey, for you
guys...anything!!
By the way, I won the race, for the third time in a row, retiring
the trophy. I was almost late, & on arrival, had to head for the
starting line. No time to dawdel, prepare or warm up. But my broom was
ready, tuned up & turbo-powered by our own Mr. Goodwrench, back on the
farm. We were in excellent condition, having trained for the last 4
months. We were ready!!!
There was strong competition. There were entries from many
countries. Germany sent a heavy thick, powerful model, but it was built
for power, not speed & couldn't keep up. England sent an antique broom
that was basically worn out & lacked the stamina to finish. Italy got
cute & tried an oar with a spell on it, but the paddle at the end wasn't
aerodynamic enough to make the speed. It dragged & slowed the speed
down. The Russians sent a a worn out broom, mounted by a very thin,
tired witch. The race was too exhausting & they dropped out. India sent
a carpet flying witch, but the dew was too heavy & the carpet got
waterlogged, slowed & sank. I was sorry not to see entries from
Australia & New Zealand, but I understand they already have entries in
training for next year, coached by John Sargeant & Tony Hicks. There
were several others, including a society-club-woman type witch, on an
electric broom, powered by batteries. but the batteries were too heavy,
& ran out of power before the race was through. It was a tough race. but
the French were the only real competition. They had a trendy,
streamlined little model that really turned on the speed. Unfortunately,
her lights weren't so good, & she got knocked off her broom over the
last 10 miles of the race, by flying into some electrical wires. She
wasn't hurt, but I never thought I'd hear a witch use such language. I
was laughing so hard, I almost fell off my broom at the finish line. My
dual cat, turbo charged broom was the fastest & the dual beam
headlights were a stroke of genius. The cats are still mad at me,
because I crossed the finish & charged up into the sky & did an inverted
loop of victory, & then skywrote "Pumpkins Forever". They are still a
bit airsick. Hey, to make an omelet, you got to break a few eggs.
Anyway, I was so tired on the way home (it got cold, too), that I
almost fell off my broom. That'll teach me to get too complacent.
Your respectful correspondent (also a bit gleeful)
The PumpkinWitch.
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