Re: Attn:Puzzled Adam and Moderator

**s*@iserv.net**

I too can see both sides of this. Those of us who have been on this list a
while are familiar with Adam's "virtual" personality. He is indeed a very
valuable participant and I'm always grateful for his news postings and
wide-ranging curiosity and knowledge. But he's often sort of touchy, and
for people new to the list, that may not come off very well.

I made an off-list request to Adam and -- though I was surprised when I
reread it -- neglected to say please. And he took me to task for it. I
have no issue with that -- in fact, it made me more conscious of that
going forward so I was thankful for the reminder. But it's much different
to do that on-list.

I too found the student's request to contain the concept of "please" even
though it didn't say the word. In fact, in re-reading it (unlike when I
reread my own in the case above) I didn't really see where the word please
would go, and I found the wording pleasant and polite. I have corresponded
off-list with her a few times and had the same impression.

However, it's clear to me that she struggles with the English language a
little, and it seems that her second e-mail reflects that much more than
her first. It also, to me, reflects someone who was, as Ms. Tiger says,
hurt. So it seems to me that we all need to think about how what we say
will be received, and err on the side of understanding and compassion.

Cynthia Price
Greater Grand Rapids Food Systems Council

> for what its worth, adam has long been a valuable member of the cg list
> and
> a stalwart friend of community gardens. he is prone - from time to time -
> to
> outbursts.
>
> adam, how bout an apology?
>
> its a good reminder that members of list serves do not like being  slammed
> in
> an email.  it hurts.
>
> judy tiger, washington dc
>
>
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