Re: now food, was No gardening?

LOL - good one.

On 12/12/07, Johnson Cyndi D Civ 95 CG/SCSRT <cyndi.johnson@edwards.af.mil>
wrote:
>
> HA!!
> However I disagree with #6. Judicious exercise aids digestion, so you
> can eat more.
>
> Cyndi
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: owner-gardenchat@hort.net [o*@hort.net] On
> Behalf Of Donna
> Sent: Wednesday, December 12, 2007 11:45 AM
> To: gardenchat@hort.net
> Subject: Re: [CHAT] now food, was No gardening?
>
> well internet jokes are always around.... but I can't resist sending due
> to the current discussion - it is so fitting!  LOL!
>
> Donna
>
> HOLIDAY EATING TIPS
>
> 1.   Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet
> Table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit.  In fact, if you see
> carrots, leave immediately.  Go next door, where they're serving rum
> balls.
>
> 2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly.  It's rare.  You
> can't
> find  it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it
> has 10,000  calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn
> into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it.
> Have one for me.  Have two.  It's later than you think. It's Christmas!
>
> 3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of
> gravy.
> Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your
> mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
>
> 4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask  if they're  made with skim milk
> or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a
> sports
> car with an  automatic transmission.
>
> 5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control
> your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat
> other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
>
> 6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New
> Year's.
> You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is
> the
> time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table
> while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
>
> 7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table,  like
> frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position
> yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before
> becoming the center of attention. They're like a  beautiful pair of
> shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.
>
> 8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or
> if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always
> have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert?  Labor
> Day?
>
> 9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the
> mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have
> some standards..sheesh!
>
> 10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party
> or get up from the  table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read
> tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.
>
>
> Remember this motto to live by:
>
> "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of
> arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to
> skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body
> thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming, "WOO HOO, what a
> ride!"
>
> Have a great holiday season.
>
>
>
> james singer <islandjim1@verizon.net> wrote:
> I agree with all you guys. Food is joy.
>
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-- 
Pam Evans
Kemp TX
zone 8A

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