Re: I know I shouldn't....
- To:
- Subject: Re: I know I shouldn't....
- From: K* A*
- Date: Tue, 7 Dec 1999 20:47:00 -0600
Thanks Lu! I've passed it on to the brits in the office and they should
like it too!
Kate
-----Original Message-----
From: Lu Treadway <Hostanut@Bellsouth.net>
To: hosta-open@mallorn.com <hosta-open@mallorn.com>
Date: Tuesday, December 07, 1999 8:04 PM
Subject: I know I shouldn't....
>...but you guys, things have just been too serious in Hostadom lately. I
>promise not to do this again, but I found this too funny and I thought that
>maybe some of you could use a laugh about now. I know I did. I needed to be
>reminded not to take this stuff too seriously, and to count my lucky stars
>that I don't have hang ups, but most of all, to thank someone up above,
that
>I'm not Clive Gould!!!
>
>Hope you enjoy as much as I did!
>
>Lu (in Guatemala)
>
>
>> > > This is an accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of
>> > > The British equivalent of the Workers' Compensation Board.
>> > > This is the bricklayer's report, a true story.
>> > >
>> > > Dear Sir,
>> > >
>> > > I am writing in response to your request for additional
information
>> > > in Block_3 of the accident report form. I put "Poor Planning" as
>the
>> > > cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I
>trust the
>> > > following details will be sufficient.
>> > >
>> > > I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was
>> > > working alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I
>> > > completed my work, I found I had some bricks left over which,
>> > > when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500lbs.
>> > > Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them
>> > > in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of
>the
>> > > building at the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I
>went up
>> > > to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it.
>> > > Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure
>a slow
>> > > descent of the bricks.
>> > > You will note in block _11 of the accident report form that my
>> > > Weight is 135 lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the
>ground
>> > > so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of
the
>> > > rope.
>> > >
>> > > Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the
>> > > building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel
>which
>> > > was now > > proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed.
>> > > This explains the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken
>> > > collarbone, as listed in Section 3 of the accident report form.
>> > > Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping
>> > > until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the
>> > > pulley.
>> > >
>> > > Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and
was
>> > > able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of the excruciating
pain
>I
>> > > was now beginning to experience.
>> > >
>> > > At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit
>> > > the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of
>> > > the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50
lbs.
>> > > I refer you again to my weight. As you might imagine, I began a
>> > > Rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity of
>> > > the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.
>> > >
>> > > This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and
severe
>> > > lacerations of my legs and lower body.
>> > >
>> > > Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the
>> > > barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell
>> > > into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were
>> > > cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile
>> > > of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and
>> > > presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching
>the
>> > > empty barrel begin its journey back onto me.
>> > >
>> > > This explains the two broken legs.
>> > >
>> > > Yours Faithfully,
>> > >
>> > > Clive R Gould
>>
>> >
>> >
>>
>>
>> **********************************************************************
>>
>>
>
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