RE: Fear and Loathing In the Secret Patch

Don't you worry! OUR DAY WILL COME!! 

Next year I am going to have one patch on the bad side of the house where I
just throw a seed in there and throw some water at it now and then.  I will
pretend I am a newbie. I might have to wear a disquise or something so those
pumpkins gods don't know it is me at it YET AGAIN.  lol

You said it, oh so well! 

Sighing as I look at my "could have been a contender!!!!!" pumpkins as I
weep in mourning and pound the earth with my clenched fists .....

:-)

 ~ Valerie
 


-----Original Message-----
From: owner-pumpkins@hort.net [o*@hort.net] On Behalf Of
vince
Sent: Tuesday, August 30, 2005 9:18 AM
To: pumpkins@hort.net
Subject: Fear and Loathing In the Secret Patch


I've often wondered what motivates the continual malevolent antics of the
pumpkin gods.  What drives them to bestow such unspeakable horrors on gentle
nurturing pumpkin growers?  Their treacherous creativity this year is
unsurpassed and the resulting misery index of pumpkin growers seems at an
all-time high....

I've read with dismay the tormented stories on this list and on
bigpumkins.com where growers casually reveal their personal pumpkin
tragedies - doing their best to hide their angst... but in the background
you can hear the laughter of the pumpkin gods and you know that they're just
gonna dig it in....  

There's a first time grower somewhere near you - who just threw a seed in
the ground... and will show up at the weigh-off with a perfectly sound 1,200
pounder... They are such shits!

So - thanks to the criminal insensitivity of the pumpkin gods... (and my own
stupidity) my season has quietly slipped down the toilet... (can you sense
the angst?) and so it goes... so it goes...  

I was going to reveal the whole horrible story... the stump that frothed at
the mouth like a rabid dog, the squirming hordes of critters, the plagues of
black aphids, the waves of rats.  It is a truly horrific story that bleeds
gallons of vile, rotting pumpkin juice.  But - I will not give those
bastards the pleasure.....

My last lingering hope, slowly and painfully assumed a grotesque twisted
shape so hideous - the plant mercifully aborted it at about 200 pounds.

There are still some surprises in the secret patch, some oddly geometric,
some strangely deformed, some showing glowing hints of a glorious orange.

I just cringe at the thought of what the pumpkin gods have in store for
them....

vince


		
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