Re: a serious question
- To: pumpkins@mallorn.com
- Subject: Re: a serious question
- From: L* R* <r*@cyber-quest.com>
- Date: Fri, 23 Jan 1998 19:39:13 -0500
- References: <2109663580@bbs.cyber-quest.com>
you might be a pumpkin grower if....
your favorite drink is miracle-gro and orange juice..
pumpkins@mallorn.com wrote:
> In a message dated 98-01-23 12:15:52 EST, you write:
>
> << Subj: RE: a serious question
> Date: 98-01-23 12:15:52 EST
> From: MikeN@optiosoftware.com (Mike Nepereny)
> Sender: owner-pumpkins@mallorn.com
> Reply-to: pumpkins@mallorn.com
> To: pumpkins@mallorn.com
>
> To paraphrase Jeff Foxworthy, "You might be a giant pumpkin grower
> if..."
>
>
> Any takers? >>
>
> *Heat your soil with electric heating cable.
> *Think money no object.
> *Talk to your Pumpkin.
> *Cover it with blankets on cold nights.
> *Supplement sunlight with artificial light using 1000 watt Sylvania Metalarc
> lamps,
> (Pumkinguy 1988).
> *Build walls around the pumpkin patch to block the wind.
> *Spend more time with your Pumpkin than your Spouse.
> *Set up elaborate electric livestock fence to protect it.
> *Build a Greenhouse over your garden in September to extend the season.
> *Have a PC based program to track daily growth, weather conditions and feeding
> schedules.
> *Steal your neighbors leaves for compost.
> *Subscribe to an Internet Pumpkin Mailing List.
> *Put Magic Crystals in your Pumpkin Watering can to cleanse the earth, (some
> sort
> of Australian ritual).
> *Carve your Pumpkin into a boat and sail it across a lake. (Pumkinguy again)
> *Do work only to be paid in Manure for your Pumpkin Patch.
> *Last but not least, kill a Pumpkin with kindness.
>
> George
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