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Re: tolerance of lack of same/ alone

I always tell my husband when he gets to complaining about how his
daughters talk back to him about everything, that he must remember he is
the man they are testing themselves on when they are little so that they
can grow into strong, confident women who will be no man's
doormat...sometimes the mouthiness of my children never fails to amaze
me, but on the other hand, I'm rather proud of them for not being afraid
to be who they are and say what they think/feel. I'm fairly confident
they are also getting the message about being loving and kind, too so
hopefully they will turn out to be well balanced adults...it's always a
tricky act to try to get them to be respectful yet not compromise
themselves in the process, isn't it?

Melody, IA (Z 5/4)

"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious."    
--Albert Einstein

 --- On Tue 11/25, Jesse Bell < jesserenebell@hotmail.com > wrote:
From: Jesse Bell [mailto: jesserenebell@hotmail.com]
To: gardenchat@hort.net
Date: Tue, 25 Nov 2003 20:48:28 -0600
Subject: Re: [CHAT]tolerance of lack of same/ alone

Now see? That's why I garden. I give to the earth, the earth gives back,
<br>and you in turn give to others who probably would have NEVER
bothered to <br>figure out that a luffa is a gourd and not something
from the bottom of the <br>sea! You educated them, you got them excited
about gardening and growing <br>things that are new to them and they
will in turn, share with others. That <br>is a wonderful thing Pam. And
those women are those type who put their <br>identity in a man and not
themselves. I tell my girls to marry somebody who <br>COMPLIMENTS their
life, not compromises it. Somebody who appreciates them <br>for who they
really are...and if nobody does...then SO WHAT? Others will. <br>But if
they believe in themselves and glow from within....they will attract
<br>somebody who will appreciate that. I refuse to raise doormats. Your
mother <br>raised you to be strong....Amazon women and Valkyries were
strong <br>women...and remember "Well behaved women rarely make
history". So there.<br><br>Jesse Rene' Bell<br>Claremore, OK<br>Zone
6<br><br><br><br><br><br>>From: "Pamela J. Evans"
<gardenqueen@gbronline.com><br>>Reply-To: gardenchat@hort.net<br>>To:
<gardenchat@hort.net><br>>Subject: Re: [CHAT]tolerance of lack of same/
alone<br>>Date: Tue, 25 Nov 2003 20:01:31 -0600<br>><br>>Well thanks
lady, I appreciate that. I just know I'll never understand<br>>people if
I live to be a hundred. And people wonder why I prefer the<br>>company
of animals and plants?? Figure it out Einstein. On a joyous<br>>note, I
took a bucket full of luffa gourds to work and people were<br>>totally
excited about making their own luffa sponges and snapping them<br>>up!!
It was awesome. I handed out drying and processing instructions
and<br>>everyone was acting like I'd discovered how to split the atom
or<br>>something. It was a very educational experience for these folks
and some<br>>are even bound and determined to grow gourds next year.
That was very<br>>cool indeed.<br>><br>><br>>---------- Original Message

-------------------<br>>From: "Andrea H"
<hodgesaa@islc.net><br>>Reply-To: gardenchat@hort.net<br>>Date: Tue, 25
Nov 2003 20:52:07 -0500<br>><br>> >Oh Pam, just remember what Jesse
says. 'People are stupid!" It's hard to<br>> >ignore remarks like that
sometimes though. Especially when you are <br>>feeling<br>> >icky
already. WE don't think you're strange!<br>> >A<br>> ><br>> >Andrea
H<br>> >Beaufort, SC<br>> ><br>> ><br>> >----- Original Message
-----<br>> >From: "Pamela J. Evans" <gardenqueen@gbronline.com><br>>
>To: <gardenchat@hort.net><br>> >Sent: Tuesday, November 25, 2003 8:51
PM<br>> >Subject: Re: [CHAT]tolerance of lack of same/ alone<br>> ><br>>
><br>> >> One more example of this one mule town and I'll shut up. Our
water was<br>> >> off today (main break on the next street) so I
couldn't water. I went<br>> >> next door to saw hello to the older
couple who run the snack bar at the<br>> >> auction, who are dear people
and have become friends. In the background<br>> >> you could hear a
couple old biddies. "whos' that" "oh my dear, don't <br>>you<br>> >>
know?" "no" "that's THAT woman who lives next door" "oh no, that one
<br>>who<br>> >> lives alone w/ that big cat and all those plants?" "oh
yes, haven't you<br>> >> heard about HER?"<br>> >><br>> >> Like I have
leprosy or something?? Ruth gave them a withering look, I<br>> >> rolled
my eyes and said good evening and left. Ugh. This my friends is<br>> >>
what I contend w/ every day. Water off a duck's back for the most
part,<br>> >> but I had an abominable headache and found it annoying
tonight. What<br>> >> fun.<br>> >><br>> >> Like my neighbor Joanne says
"get a life - get a garden". A retired<br>> >Special Ed teacher - she's
fabulous!<br>> >><br>> >> Happy Thanksgiving to all BTW...<br>> >><br>>
>> ---------- Original Message ----------------------------------<br>>
>> From: "Jesse Bell" <jesserenebell@hotmail.com><br>> >> Reply-To:
gardenchat@hort.net<br>> >> Date: Tue, 25 Nov 2003 11:23:38 -0600<br>>
>><br>> >> >Hey, I can relate. Truly. A houseful

of teenagers is not for the <br>>faint<br>> >of<br>> >> >heart let me
tell ya.<br>> >> ><br>> >> >Jesse Rene' Bell<br>> >> >Claremore, OK<br>>
>> >Zone 6<br>> >> ><br>> >> ><br>> >> ><br>> >> ><br>> >> >>From:
kmrsy@comcast.net<br>> >> >>Reply-To: gardenchat@hort.net<br>> >> >>To:
gardenchat@hort.net<br>> >> >>Subject: Re: [CHAT]tolerance of lack of
same/ alone<br>> >> >>Date: Tue, 25 Nov 2003 16:24:28 +0000<br>> >>
>><br>> >> >>Jesse,<br>> >> >>reminds me of a story my mother told of
how, when I was an infant, <br>>Pat<br>> >> >>was ~20mos, and Sue was
5-6 yrs. Once every few wks she got a night <br>>out<br>> >> >>all by
her lonesome and went to a movie. That night it was pouring
<br>>rain,<br>> >> >>she couldn't get a cab, her umbrella broke in the
wind, the heel came<br>> >> >>off her shoe, she fell down a hill, and
missed half the movie. She <br>>said<br>> >> >>it was worth it to get
that time alone.<br>> >> >><br>> >> >>Kitty<br>> >> >> > OH man...I hear
ya Gene. Love my husband, love my kids...but I <br>>would<br>> >>
>>really<br>> >> >> > like to be able to take a bath or go to the
bathroom without <br>>somebody<br>> >> >> > calling my name or walking
in on me. It gets old. And no matter <br>>how<br>> >> >>much I<br>> >>
>> > gripe...it seems to fall on deaf ears!! I'm 41...hitting that
<br>>time<br>> >in<br>> >> >>my<br>> >> >> > life when some alone time
is needed and very much required. My<br>> >family<br>> >> >> > doesn't
seem to understand that. It's "honey, honey, honey and <br>>mom,<br>> >>
>>mom,<br>> >> >> > mom". Ughhh. The youngest three children are all 15
years<br>> >old...they<br>> >> >>can<br>> >> >> > fend for themselves
for awhile. And I have to ask my husband <br>>every<br>> >now<br>> >>
>>and<br>> >> >> > then "What did you do before you married me and you
were a single<br>> >> >> > father...try to remember...and do that again
for me, huh?" I<br>> >remember<br>> >> >>my<br>> >> >> > mother going
throught this very same thing...and thinking "geez, <br>>what<br>>
>a<br>> >> >>

> grouch!". There were five kids in that household...and my father
<br>>did<br>> >> >> > NOTHING to help around there.<br>> >> >> ><br>> >>
>> ><br>> >> >> > Jesse Rene' Bell<br>> >> >> > Claremore, OK<br>> >> >>
> Zone 6<br>> >> >> ><br>> >> >> ><br>> >> >> ><br>> >> >> > >From:
"Gene Bush" <genebush@otherside.com><br>> >> >> > >Reply-To:
gardenchat@hort.net<br>> >> >> > >To: <gardenchat@hort.net><br>> >> >> >
>Subject: Re: [CHAT]tolerance of lack of same/ alone<br>> >> >> > >Date:
Tue, 25 Nov 2003 07:08:18 -0500<br>> >> >> > ><br>> >> >> > >Hello
Kitty,<br>> >> >> > > I found that the longer one lives alone the more
difficult <br>>it<br>> >is<br>> >> >>to<br>> >> >> > >form<br>> >> >> >
>a relationship where the two of you move in together, marry or
<br>>what<br>> >> >>ever<br>> >> >> > >you<br>> >> >> > >choose where
you live together *all the time*. Whew!! The <br>>changes,<br>>
>the<br>> >> >> > >adapting to taking another into consideration if you
simply <br>>wanted<br>> >to<br>> >> >>go to<br>> >> >> > >the bathroom
by yourself. Been married for a bit now and still <br>>have<br>> >>
>>trouble<br>> >> >> > >once in a while with two people in this house at
the same time. <br>>Does<br>> >> >>not<br>> >> >> > >mean I care any
less for who I am married to.... but... somehow <br>>it<br>> >is<br>> >>
>>all<br>> >> >> > >worth it at the end of the day.<br>> >> >> > > Gene
E. Bush<br>> >> >> > >Munchkin Nursery & Gardens, llc<br>> >> >> >
>www.munchkinnursery.com<br>> >> >> > >genebush@munchkinnursery.com<br>>
>> >> > >Zone 6/5 Southern Indiana<br>> >> >> > ><br>> >> >> > >-----
Original Message ----- > Pam,<br>> >> >> > >snip...<br>> >> >> > > >
Living alone is not unusual. Lots of people do. As long as <br>>it<br>>
>> >>works<br>> >> >> > >for<br>> >> >> > > > you and you have the
network of friends you want and need<br>> >(including<br>> >> >> >
>Sugar),<br>> >> >> > > > there is no need to feel odd-man-out. I've
been alone since <br>>'89<br>> >and<br>> >> >> > >frankly<br>> >> >> > >
> these 14 ye

s have been much better for me than the previous <br>>14.<br>> >I<br>>
>> >> > >don't<br>> >> >> > > > understand why anyone would give you a
hard time for being <br>>single<br>> >> >>and<br>> >> >> > > >
orientation is nobody's business.<br>> >> >> > > ><br>> >> >> > > >
Kitty<br>> >> >> > ><br>> >> >> ><br>>
>> >> > >To sign-off this list, send email to majordomo@hort.net with
the<br>> >> >> > >message text UNSUBSCRIBE GARDENCHAT<br>> >> >> >
><br>> >> >> ><br>> >> >> >
>> >> > Set yourself up for fun at home! Get tips on home
entertainment<br>> >> >>equipment,<br>> >> >> > video game reviews, and
more here.<br>> >> >> > http://special.msn.com/home/homeent.armx<br>> >>
>> ><br>> >> >> >
>> >> > To sign-off this list, send email to majordomo@hort.net with
the<br>> >> >> > message text UNSUBSCRIBE GARDENCHAT<br>> >> >><br>> >>
>> >>To sign-off this list, send email to majordomo@hort.net with
the<br>> >> >>message text UNSUBSCRIBE GARDENCHAT<br>> >> >><br>> >>
><br>> >>
>> >online games and music with a high-speed Internet connection!
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><br>> >><br>> >> --<br>> >> Pam Evans<br>> >> Kemp TX/zone 8A<br>>
>><br>> >><br>> >><br>> >> --<br>> >><br>> >>
>> To sign-off this list, send email to majordomo@hort.net with th

e<br>> >> message text UNSUBSCRIBE GARDENCHAT<br>> ><br>>
>To sign-off this list, send email to majordomo@hort.net with the<br>>
>message text UNSUBSCRIBE GARDENCHAT<br>> ><br>> ><br>><br>>--<br>>Pam
Evans<br>>Kemp TX/zone
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