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Re: Stan's strip (flower and veggie)


Nice to have you back:  flowers are food for the soul.

----------
> From: ROSS E STANFORD <pattie@juno.com>
> To: veggie-list@eskimo.com
> Subject: Stan's strip (flower and veggie)
> Date: Sunday, August 16, 1998 4:07 PM
> 
> 
> I'mmmmmmmm Baaaaaaaaaaaaak.
> I am feeling much better now.
>      They took, I mean, I went away for a while.  That happens
> every so often.  That's why I try to make my
> garden self sufficient.  
> 
> So, last spring, I'm sitting here and I says to myself, "Self", (that's
> what I call myself when we talk), I says "Self", and Self says
> to me, "Shhhhhh, not so loud, Meathead, the govment might
> still be listening in on your braces."  Meathead.  That's what
> Self calls me when we talk in private. So I whispers to Self,
> I says "Self, what say we take Robbie (that's the name of
> our rototiller) out back and cut a strip about 80 feet long
> and plant some purty flowers?  I love purty flowers.  We 
> don't have to tell those veggie people anything about planting
> no flowers."  So, Self says, "OK, but we gots to do it on
> the cheap.  Got any ideas, Meathead?"
>      "Sure, I gots lots of ideas.  Got one about that Melrose Place
> girl, if you want to here about it."
>      "NO, Meathead, I mean any ideas about where we gets 
> cheap flower seeds."
>      "Oh, .......ah.......well......no."
>      "Ok, here's the plan.  We goes to Home De Pot and we buys
> twenty of them there flower seed packets that are dated 
> for 1997.  They're only a nickel a packet.  That would mean
> we could get a gazillion seeds for a dollar.  You got a dollar,
> Meathead?"
>      "No, but I once had a shinney new penny that I put in my shoe to
> make it a penny loafer.  Kept getting a blister on my heal and always
> walked in a circle after that."
>      "Yeah, been there, done that.  Anyway, we can go to the mall
> and fish out a hunnered pennies out of the fountain.  Maybe Robbie
> will have that strip rototilled by the time we get back."
>      Well, we got the seeds, and got back to the yard, and of
> course, Robbie hadn't done anything yet.  But that's good ole
> Robbie.  You gotta love him anyway.  
>      We rototilled, (and sang a few songs as well) (Robbie has
> a great baritone voice) and then scattered the seeds and 
> raked them in and laid down a soaker hose on top and hooked
> it to the garden soaker hose system.
>      
>      Well, its August now and not a single flower has emerged.
> Not one!  Weeds, yes.  Flowers, no!.  (Self thinks it was something
> in the water at the fountain that tainted the pennies).  I have no
> ideas, (other than that one about that blonde on MP.)  Robbie
> is still singing and lusting after The Little Engine That Could.
>      Any ideas out there?  I mean ideas about the failed flower
> experiment!
>      Ops, I forgot, I wasn't going to mention anything about
> this to you veggie people.  Please disregard.
> 
> Stan              the cheap and lazy gardener
> Zone - Twilight
> State - Confusion
> Favorite vegetable - my son
> 
> P.S.  There was one tomato seed mixed in with all of those
>          flower seeds, so this post IS veggie related.
> 
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