Re: CAT: Sales hints revealed

For an old Norwegian bachelor farmer, not wise in the wiles of feminine
duplicity, this forum is so valuable I don't understand why it's free. It
certainly has helped me in visitor's sales to my beds.

The ladies whose husbands come along with lots of cold water to throw on their
enthusiasm I invite to sit in a shady area next to the potted hosta sales and
enjoy their cigarettes while the ladies view the flowers. By the time we've
walked out of earshot and sight, the order writing starts, freed of all
constraint. Sometimes we have to agree on our story before returning to the
husbands, and once or twice I've had to hold the order so the ladies could slip
back on another day with the money.

This year I've been getting visits from the flea market iris venders, who dig
clumps of blooming iris and sell them by the bagful at a dollar a throw. One of
them the other day said, "I ain't never bought no $3 iris before." I told him
the difficulties involved just keeping track of the names, and how when that
fails, I also have a 20 unnamed iris $20 assortment. But, I pointed out, beyond
that it takes the same amount of work to raise cheap iris as well as expensive.
Pointing at a two-year clump of 10 I said, "you make $10 on a clump like this,
probably less, while I'll make $30 on it for the same amount of time and work.
When you've only got two acres, you think about things like that."

"Hell," he said, "I got 53 acres, and I don't have to worry about no nursery
inspector, nor washing roots in Chlorox water nor none of that."

Later I asked how I could find his place, that I'd maybe like to see what he
had. Pity the nursery inspector is so overworked. I could probably give him a
nice shopping list of unlicensed growers and so add to the state revenue stream.

James Brooks

Ah, what a tangled web we weave....

James Brooks

irisborer@aol.com wrote:

>   Fortunately, I have a job
> and a very capable 'rationalization gene' that allows me to justify spending
> far too much on plants (don't tell sweet Lenny).
>
> 1.  I did not attend the Oscars - saved $2,000 for plants and such
> 2.  I did not order a Ferrari - Savings $$$$$
>
> You get the picture.
>
> Anyway, my advice on the prices of irises and others is to never look back,
> never add up the checkbook and hide the packing list from the spouse.
>
> Kathy Guest in East Aurora, NY - who also has to hide the slivers of lawn
> craftily removed when aforementioned Lenny is golfing upside down in the
> compost heap.  Nothing but smoke and mirrors at Stately Guest Manor


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